A Long Walk Through The Rough Way Of My Life

Don't know how & from where to start? I am walking on the rough way of my life very well although my life was very tough in the begining. I think that life is an adventure so we have to dare it. Now I think all these obstacles r just for wisdom & I always try to overcome them. They r just for new change. I am trying to bring revolutionary change in my & other's life. I know this is very complex task but I need to dare that. I have heard a saying that we must be very very good at something, which is very very hard to do. Only then we will be success. Although I couldn't feel any charmness & preetyness in my life, I am trying to express how happy life is.

Although I grown up in a tough environment, I couldn't be too strong. Even small things can change my feelings. This is really hard for me to deal with. I always try to be more patience & will be trying untill life is no more. I got many opportunities for study, & for other but couldn't get that everyone wants to get after getting good educational qualifiation. I know I deserve better opportunities but the environment I am living in is different. Unlike other region, here I can do best only If I have money & power. Indeed wealth is nothing but sometimes it is everything. The case of sometimes hapens here. While I was small I used to imagine what will hapen If I become a doctor? Not only I but everyone like me have dream like this but too few of them achieve whatever they like. No matter how intellegent you are & how needy you are, you can't get better opportunities unless you have good power.

Still I am trying to achieve my goal without these. I am creeping to reach that destination. Too few people are encouraging me & helping me. Almost time I feel ashamed & self humuliated because of that. How much thay can help me & for how long? Until death? I practiced many lifestyles but I couldn't get rid of dependency. Everytime I need someone & something to help & fortunately I get all the time. If I see through the eye of my society & it's people, I am great but I could never be great in my own eyes. People, friends praise me even in small action but I could never be praisable in my own eyes. I can hardly find my moment of joys. I could not smile from my heart. I have everything from one angle but still not happy with my life. I always try to discover what is lacking in my life? I have friend, families, well wishers but why still sad? May be this will be the question for me all the time.

I will be moving ahead with this simple question. May be because I couldn't get what I deserved? I run with my documents in many streets hoping my certificate with good first devision marks will be rewarded but I return with frustrated face. My labour is insulted everytime. Another part of my life is bend to social issues. Actually this is my greatest hobby & I want this to remain only hobby. I got many people involving in these field to be corrupted that's why they need to manage money for their family, their education, etc. Because they took these field as their profession. I think it should not be like profession & like business. May be my life will be tougher than this but I won't take these as my profession. I am struggling for survival of own but still thinking about other's life. This seems funny but I think at least I can try. I know failures are the pillars of success. I am welcoming more failures only to see how success like.

I am eager to feel deep smile from my heart. Let see what hapens next. I am looking at my target but I don't know the way. That is narrow, rough & probably not safe. But still moving on to feel how life is. Only to kiss my dreams!!!!!!!